Straight from the heart …

 “And she departed…leaving behind a volley of questions” – RIP Nirbhaya.

I am always inclined to take logical stand on any/all issues - seems to be the MBA effect. Be it anything, I must be skeptical at first and then clearly weigh all the aspects and then take a stand. I have somehow started feeling obligated to being structured, un-biased logical and non-spontaneous. And this shift from being emotionally driven to logically driven has been slow but extremely consistent over the years. Thanks to our education system my thoughts don’t always reflect my feelings. They usually take over to such an extent that many a times I have a lot of thoughts but no feelings towards many things. I don’t know if it’s good or bad. The more I think about it, I realize that being in touch with your feelings is something you can’t afford to loose.

The whole of India was beating along with Nirbhaya’s heart for the past two weeks. I, not being particularly engaged with anything, was busy analyzing everything that was going on via the news papers and channels. I always knew it’s not easy for girls in India but never really appreciated what it is like to grow up as a girl in Indian cities. This lack of empathy gave me the liberty to critically look at the whole issue and think how the clamor for capital punishment can be an immature one. I guess it’s completely different to know something and to feel something. Nevertheless, we keep learning. This topic came up during a conversation with a few friends. It was very obvious from the resentment and anger all of them shared over the issue that there is no scope for any discussion, there needs to be no debate, for the answer is clear and with full conviction – zero tolerance. I haven’t come across any lady who can confidently say that the situation is not as bad as it seems. This movement was long-long overdue. Conventional wisdom says we don’t take decisions while we’re upset. I think this is one of the situations where decision needs to be made now.  It is one of such issues where it’s better if logic goes for a toss. This decision has to be right from the heart and it’s pretty clear this time – enough is enough.

                                       

Stricter law for Rape: What is the govt got to gain?

Thanks to facebook, any and all of the social issues are these days more lively and get the attention they deserve. The issue of a stricter law for crime against women is one such burning issue these days. Severe protests were carried on all around the nation and for understandable reasons. Women in India grow up facing eve-teasing and harassment in other forms and accept it as a part and parcel of life. Most of them have assumed the convenient path of - "ignorance" is bliss -  to tackle the issue. This is a real shame and needs to change.

Although, among this whole web of arguments, allegations and revolts I fail to appreciate something. What is the government got to gain by not having a stricter law ? We have been constantly accusing the government of wrong-doings against those protesting in the Delhi. We accuse the police of mishandling the protesters. We have constantly accused the ministers of not being sensitive towards the issue. But what is personal gain a police-man could have by beating the protester. Is he getting Rs 1000 or something per protestor he uses his stick on. All I understand is he has to be pretty strong to stand against people whom he actually supports but is duty-bound to contain them. I can understand why the ministers would like to quell the protests against a stronger Lokpal. I can understand why they would like subdue anything against FDI. But why this time ? Do the prospective rapists have an arrangement with the government to give them leniency and in return they vote Congress next time?  I just fail to understand why would government oppose this ? In-fact the government should be happy that they now have a reason to counter the human right activists, formulate a stricter law and take credit for it in the next poles. And if this is the case, who really is to blame for the water canons and the tear gas and the lathi charge going on in the center.

Can anybody help ?

Do I know you ?

The human mind is one of the most mysterious things ever. If you are curious by nature you can’t help but fall for psychology. The best thing of psychology is that it is not as definitive as Mathematics. At the same time, it is not as vague as art. It is something in between. And it titillates a curious mind as nothing else can.

I am writing this post to talk about a well known model to describe the structure of human psyche. This model was proposed by Sigmund Freud, an Austrian psychologist considered the father of psycho-analysis. He proposed the existence of three different elements in the human psyche. These are not physically different compartments in the brain but virtual elements. The foremost and the most basic is the “id”. This element completely works on the pleasure principle. It is the one which any child is born with. All it wants is immediate gratification of all its senses. This is the ‘animal like’ facet of our personality. This is what we call the basic instinct of any human being.

Next comes “ego”. This is the reality factor. This is the element which is responsible for us dealing with reality.  When the id makes unreasonable demands, it is the ego which weighs in the pros and cons of the same and either allows that behavior or delays or abandons it.

Ego is followed by “Super-ego” in human beings. This is the element which holds all the morals and standards. Following these morals and standards leads to feeling of accomplishments. The “conscience” is part of this element. Going against this may lead to feelings of guilt and remorse even if they satisfy the id and the ego.

The id, ego and the super ego work together to shape human behavior. The amount of power residing with each of these varies from person to person. Conflicts are bound to arise but it is the ego strength of the person which as to resolve them.

Till now whatever we discussed was intuitive, nothing “new” about it, right? Right. Here is the part which for me was the gold nugget from this whole story. The two images are depictions of the concept representing the three elements in two different formats. The second one is my favorite. It broadly represents what percentage of human psyche is governed by which element. The “id” wins hands-down. The very idea of using the iceberg analogy communicates how much the personality of a person is shaped by the “id”. I started thinking about how in day to day life people’s perceptions of others are based on that freakishly small tip of the iceberg. People are very quick to form opinions. My guess is for more than 95% of the people, we think we know them better than we actually do. It’s very common to notice somebody’s behavior in public or among friends, which is excessively regulated by the ego and the super-ego and accordingly act or react. I wonder why isn’t there aren’t any interview round corresponding to “actually knowing” a candidate before hiring. We need to tap into their “id” which lies all the way down there in the unconscious part of the brain.  

Happy thinking !

The known and the unkown ....

Do I really believe in god? What is religion after all? Am I god-loving or god-fearing ? These are a few questions which reckon our attention every now and then. These are as fundamental as are the questions – who am I? or why am I here ? and deserve our utmost attention. I am only writing this post to encourage anyone reading it to make a sincere effort to get in touch with your inner-self on this issue, unless of-course they you have already done it. There are two sides –

First is - you believe in a super-natural power, who is, in some way, responsible for life as we know it. Now, the origin of this belief can be two way. Either you really, truly, from the bottom of your heart believe it or it can be your mind and the societal conditioning and the pressure of being “good” (societal definition) playing tricks on you. There is an easy way to distinguish. You just need to ask yourself the question that how much time do you devote to love, understand or connect to your super-power. The time spent can be in various forms. The only condition to be satisfied here is the activity should be self-less. It should be the result of your urge to know and understand the master and not a bribe for a better future or a settlement for good things happened in the past. It can be through prayer, meditation, reading literature, time spent on self-improvement with is done with the thought that the super-power wants you to improve etc. etc. You can trust your judgment on this because you know yourself the best. By mere probing into this question, you will get the answer.

Second is - you are a non-believer. “Life is there by chance”. You enjoy every moment as it is, and don’t feel the urge to understand any deeper meaning as it doesn’t exist. If you make a map or chart of things occupying your mind at any point in time, almost all the things would be related to something you have already encountered or something you expect to encounter in your life-time. Not much of it is about the “unknown”.

If you fall into one of the categories you are fine. But if you stand stranded you need more clarity. For ex. If you talk about believing in the super-natural and at the same time the share of your time, mind and heart devoted to the same is negligible something is not right.